A very personal share which I didn’t talk about much when it initially happened. I guess personally I attached shame to it. Shame on not being employed; not having a job. An external factor I attached my personal worth and validation to.
But when I took a step back, I realised, it’s not the worst thing to happen and there is no shame in it. There are people intentionally taking career breaks, this was my chance to take that time as well. In fact, towards the end of last year I was seeing people take a sabbatical from work to go travelling. And I was so inspired, it was such an incredible time to take a break and travel.
And then, my ‘break’ time came (in it’s own way) and I got laid off…
When it initially happened though, I didn’t see it that way. I was quite sad, and bouncing between I will be alright, and oh, I’m scared of what’s to come. I leaned on my community for support, and am incredibly grateful for their support. But another thing that helped me was changing the narrative I attached to the whole situation. There is no shame in this, it is very common especially in tech, and I am going to be just fine. And jumped immediately into sorting the formalities that come with a redundancy rather than fully processing my feelings.
But speaking to my Mum, she encouraged me to feel my feelings, and cry it all out if that’s what I needed to do. If you are going through something similar or going through anything you find hard to digest, sit with your feelings, feel them and release them. You will feel so much better for doing so.
Things went on and I took some time over Christmas to spend some time with my family.
Suddenly, I felt an urgency for me to get back into the job market. Fearful of not going back in, losing my independence and all that comes with it. I was acting out of fear, frantically submitting job applications any which way I could. Getting rejection, after rejection email for my job applications.
I got a career coach then, and she really helped me pause, reflect on what my values are, what I really want from a job and the type of role I want and the type of company I wanted to work at. Before, I would just read the job title and apply, taking it that this role is the same regardless of what company. But sometimes there were minor differences, and it was important for me to pause and go through that motion to slow the process down, as part of the practice of being intentional. Many successful mentors I look up to share about how the intention and energetics with which we do something has a HUGE impact on the outcome. And it did.
I started to bring more intention to my job search, improve the narrative in my head, and try to step out of my fear filled vibe. I started to change how I was looking at things, genuinely celebrating people getting jobs on LinkedIn, and seeing so many jobs come through, my vibe was starting to rise. And opportunities were starting to come through, because when I did see someone start a new job, or a new job posting pop up, it was a reminder to me that there are jobs out there and people are getting into roles. It was giving me a sense of hope.
And finally community. Surround yourself with good people, a support network and reach out to them for help. People want to help but they don’t know you need it if you don’t ask. If you don’t have your tribe YET (keyword there) you can create one, or go to events where your people might attend. It’s never too late.
Those were some of the things that helped me, and I hope they bring some comfort and support if you are going through something better.
To summarise:
- Feel your feelings
- Get clear on who you are and what you are looking for from your next venture. And start taking intentional action towards it.
- Get around community and lean on your community for support. It is okay to ask for help.
This is just a season and it will get better. Keep going, you got this!
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I wish I knew that earlier 
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